


Happily Never After

by lilysmiles



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Gen, M/M, Magic, Male Emma Swan, Reincarnation, Self-Insert
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-24
Updated: 2021-03-12
Packaged: 2021-03-15 14:00:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,811
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29685039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilysmiles/pseuds/lilysmiles
Summary: How reliable are visions of the future?Well… If Greek myths are used as reference and the tale of Oedipus in particular, not very. Unless they are believed in. Then they end in ruin and tragedy.So what if the foretold birth of Emma Swan went about differently? After all, even Ultrasounds are known to be wrong on occasion.SI Male Emma Swan
Comments: 28
Kudos: 46





	1. Chapter 1

Prologue

In lavishly decorated bedchambers, it was uncharacteristically busy. But then again, it wasn’t every day that a Queen gives birth. And not just any Queen but the majestic Snow White. The Princess loved by all. But what was meant to be a joyous occasion was marred by the feeling of impending doom.

“Push my Queen! Push!”

“Fuck you, you stupid bitch! Try pushing out something the size of a freaking watermelon, and I will see how you fare!”

“Think of the rewards my Queen! Just imagine how beautiful your daughter will be! Surely she will inherit her father’s gold-spun locks!”

“As long as she doesn’t inherit his brain capacity, I will be happy.”

“My Love, that was mean!” came the shout from outside the room.

“SHUT UP!!!”

“…”

“Finally…” and as if waiting for the confirmation, those words signaled a baby’s distraught cry. “Well, what are you waiting for? Where is my daughter?”

“…My Queen…”

In that moment the double doors cutting off the room from the rest of the world flew open.

“She is here!!! We are out of time!”

The Queen reached over for her child wrapped tight in a richly embroidered blanket. “Oh my sweet Emma, how much I will miss you! I wish I could be there for your first words and smile. But alas, needs must… But not to worry, for you will come and lift the curse! My little Princess! My baby Emma! Our Savior!”

With those final words, the Queen kissed her babe’s golden cowlick that had indeed taken after her husband, Charming. She then stood up with some difficulty to push her child through an inconspicuous wardrobe. And so baby Emma disappeared through a hidden portal to Earth. For good. Or so it would seem. Because all those that witnessed or knew of this event, also knew that they haven’t seen the last of the missing Princess. For Emma will come and save them all. As decreed by the Prophecy.

But all those conspirators that thought they had everything sorted out, were in for a big surprise.

For Snow White birthed a beautiful baby _boy_.

And beside a lone nurse, it was a fact none knew. And even she will shortly forget.

Chapter 1

Emmanuel Swan understood the difficulty that came with putting bread on the table. Even if such worries are now a thing of the past. _Literally_ a lifetime ago…

Another life…

Ridiculous to believe. But a fact nonetheless.

Because when you are hit by a speeding Ferrari, there are very few ways such an encounter could go. And he wasn’t enough of a fool to believe that he could walk away from it without a scratch. Honestly, at that point, he truly wished the meeting would end with his death. After all, when one has no medical insurance and no money for a good lawyer, surviving a hit-and-run with a car doing at least 60 miles per hour wouldn’t end well however you chose to look at it. Either ending up a hospital reject and left to die on the streets or becoming a helpless cripple with a debt requiring several lifetimes to pay back.

And luckily, he was neither.

He got the easy way out.

He died.

And call him a looser or weak-willed, but he would rather run away from all the problems associated with trying to live in agony and disgust towards oneself as well as the inevitable regrets of what ‘could have been’ into the afterlife.

He wasn’t naïve enough to believe that he would get anywhere close to Heaven. Honestly, with all the shit he had pulled, even Hell would probably be lenient. But the thing was, he wasn’t a Christian! And it turns out that it is fundamentally your belief that is responsible for your afterlife.

So like any self-respecting Buddhist, he entered the cycle of reincarnation. And while some naïve fools would chose to believe that reincarnating into another life, a clean slate is a boon, in reality it is very far from it. Not a punishment exactly… But nonetheless terrifying. Because the prospects of reincarnating again and again and _again,_ until he finishes whatever unfinished business it was that held him back from reaching a higher stage of metaphysical evolution the first time was complete, were _terrifying_. Because it was easy to say ‘unfinished business’. Much harder to actually identify and _complete_ whatever it is in a single lifetime. Especially when whatever it was isn’t very obvious at all. Although it did come as pleasant surprise that the universe didn’t believe him so wicked as to make him take steps back along his path. And that was only probably that whichever laws are used to judge a soul, they aren’t something humans actually believe them to be. Otherwise, he is afraid he would have inevitably reincarnated as a plant (or a microbe)…

Although he _did_ receive a real scare when he was announced to be a baby girl. But at later inspection, he chose to believe his new absentee of a mother to be rather dim-witted as well as blind. Because failing to notice the rather striking difference in genitalia of your own child is _something else_ …

And for all that he was put out at being _once **again**_ thrown away by his birth parents like a piece of trash (figures that karma is a bitch that runs in circles), he was actually glad for it. Because he wouldn’t put it beside his new parents to continue to call him Emma, make him wear pink and put him in a dress. Just his luck landing the psycho parents that wanted a baby girl. _Badly_. Although usually that kind of thing is only obvious after a couple has like five other kids. All of the same sex. At that point you really start to believe in the existence negative luck and false statistics. Because gender equality is a well-marketed myth… from his perspective anyway.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

A second chance is good and all. Unfortunately, when one is dumped into the Foster system, even the most kind person will change. Especially after a failed adoption. And had Emmanuel not remembered his previous life, he would have been devastated. After all, being adopted into the Swan family as a baby only to be dumped back into foster care because the pair that thought themselves unable to have children, ‘miraculously’ got a bun in the oven, hurts.

But Emmanuel was no ordinary child. And he understood that what happened was the ultimate betrayal of the worst kind. Had an ordinary baby been in his place, the babe would have likely suffered mental trauma and abandonment issues for the rest of their life. But he wasn’t an ordinary child. So as he did in the case of witnessing something miraculous in this life, he rightfully assumed that he was the cause. And what was given, could be just as easily taken back. He just had to _wish_.

So when the ‘bun in the oven’ turned out to be a false alarm, he honestly wasn’t surprised. Although to say that the fact that the Swans came back for him like nothing had ever happened, was even more _surprising_ to say the least. But he didn’t look a gifted horse in the mouth. After all, a family, even an honestly shitty one was a hundred times better than foster care.

And if it wouldn’t work out, he always had the _wish_.

Honestly, he hardly believed his luck when he put two and two together. How his wishes, when they were sincere, would literally come true. It was like a Disney fairy-tale. But then again, if he remembers the beginning of his life correctly, the reality isn’t far from it. Because having a mother referred to as ‘Queen’ and being shoved through a wardrobe that was actually a portal, was too Narnia-like to be believable. But he was a witness. He had his proof. Magic _did_ exist. And if for some reason his parents thought it was a wonderful idea to throw him out of their lives? Well… it’s not like he needs them. And while he is grateful for the genetics that have gifted him his special power, he doesn’t care enough to actually look for them or ‘save them’. Because naïve ‘Saviors’ wielding swords and fighting dragons only had their happy ever afters in books. Real life doesn’t work that way.

Honestly, with what he had seen so far in both of his lives, a fairy-tale world with magic is far more likely to be like the Game of Thrones Saga than Twilight (and don’t ask him why he ever watched that shit). But then again, the actual originals of the Disney movies we all know and love more often than not ended in death and tragedy with a very dubious ‘happy end’.

And it seems his new life is more likely to be like that.

He hardly cared for being a law abiding citizen. Because last time, turning away from a life of crime got him _nowhere_. Where other orphans and rejects he knew had successfully made something of themselves (or died, or ‘disappeared’) whether it was in smuggling, dealing or being involved in other less than legal things, idealists, besides a few rare exceptions, got themselves absolutely _nowhere_. Mind you, he wasn’t an idealist. Not even _close_. But for some reason, he couldn’t let go of the hope, that someday, sometime, someone will show up and turn out to be a long-lost relative or something. And he would finally be _wanted_. Sadly, he managed to die before growing out of such foolish beliefs. They brought him no comfort. No happiness. _Nothing_. Only grief and pain. As well as plenty lost opportunities and money. He had plenty of opportunities in his last life. Opportunities he didn’t take. And if he had perhaps he would have long ago been six feet under. But maybe not. After all, fortune favors the bold. He could have at least tried. Tried to make something of himself. Instead of waiting for _something_ …

Oh, in this life he had little need to lead a life of crime. After all, there are so many people out there that would pay very good money for a bit of magic. For miracles. It would be so easy. But that was the exact reason why he wouldn’t and didn’t chose the easy path. After all, governments always keep a lookout for such people. Because among hundreds if not thousands of frauds, there may be someone genuine. Someone who could solve their problems with a wave of their hand. Someone who could give them a glimpse into the future. Someone who could bring them to glory. But Emmanuel valued his freedom too much and had little wish to become that foolish person.

So his choice was obvious.

A ‘family’ life is a good cover for anything less than legal after all. Because who would ever suspect a golden-haired angel of anything unseemly? Certainly not the social workers. Not the ‘parents’ who, after their betrayal he could never consider as such. Not that they knew of it, thinking that he was too young to remember. Too young to understand. But he _did_. And he certainly had no intention to forget, or better yet, _forgive_.

He wasn’t some voiceless doormat.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mind you people, theft is terrible. Don't do it. Just sticking somewhat to canon here.

Chapter 3

While his pick-pocketing skills were a bit rusty, having gone thru death and all that, it took very little time to get them back to their stellar perfection. It was almost _too_ easy. But it wasn’t like he was learning from scratch.

Like many things, it started small.

A wallet here and there. A gold watch. Some jewelry. Some cash.

Then came the credit cards.

Pretending to be a model child was truly the best protection. Because the police would suspect anyone _but_ him. The children of alcoholics or the druggies. The teenagers that got involved with gangs. But not the only child of the Swan family that always had the best grades and picture-perfect appearance.

Honestly, he didn’t even _need_ to steal.

But once he started, he could hardly stop.

He didn’t regret it.

After all, had he not been a thief, he would have never met Neal. Although maybe in hindsight it would have been better if he _hadn’t_. But everyone is wise in hindsight. Oh well, they do say that it is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all…

It started innocent honestly…

Well, as ‘innocent’ as a break-in is, anyway.

At first everything was fine. The house-owners were fast asleep. Emmanuel was helping himself to their wallets…

But when he crept into the main bedroom to grab the jewelry, he collided with someone else. Someone, who unlike him, chose to use the window, not the front door. Someone, with similar intentions. But at the time, Emmanuel didn’t know that.

He freaked out, actually.

And so did the mysterious ‘someone’ he had the misfortune to encounter.

But he was an action over shock kind of guy. So he head-butted that mysterious someone in the face. Completely forgetting that they were both in the middle of a very much occupied bedroom.

But he wasn’t the only one to forget that wonderful little fact.

Because the mysterious witness turned rival obviously did as well. Otherwise, why did said mysterious person punch him to set them both flying (cauz he held onto the only solid thing he could grab, which turned out to be the mysterious person’s arm, for dear life) towards the bed. Not that the occupants of the bed appreciated the company. Although neither thief stuck around to find out.

They high-pitched shriek the startled woman let out and the shout of outrage from the man, were more than enough of a sign that it was time to get the hell out of dodge. And they both _did_.

But it turned out, that when a furious house-owner is chasing you holding a rifle, such things like professional rivalry and resentment towards the other person whose very presence was enough to get the two of them into that shipwreck of a situation in the first place, were forgotten. Honestly, there are few things that stimulate teamwork as much as real danger.

It was hardly surprising that instead of throwing the other under the metaphorical bus and still risk being caught, the two thieves brought together by circumstance unanimously and subconsciously chose to act as a unit.

So what if one of them threw a vase at the nearest window while the other held a chair in front of them as a shield from the trigger-happy house-owner? And why does it matter that the two circumstantial partners in-crime were holding hands when they threw themselves out of the second-story window? And if only one of them had a getaway vehicle? And that person was most definitely _not_ Emmanuel. After all, he was only scraping fifteen. And a number plate was too revealing for someone who wanted to fly completely under radar.

And so what if he took the opportunity to jump on the back of the other thief’s motorcycle?

Stranger-danger hardly mattered at this point.

Not unless he wanted to get arrested, that is.

And he most definitely _didn’t_.

And if the night ended with a stolen bottle of tequila shared on an abandoned rooftop between the two of them? A night later continued in a dingy hotel-room with a double-bed?

It’s universally accepted by people that know how to have fun that a one-night-stand doesn’t have to mean anything. You don’t have to know the person that ends up next to you. Not their name (well… you might, if you don’t want to place yourself in an awkward situation in calling them someone else’s). Not their life-story. Not even their phone number.

And at the beginning, neither of them were inclined to know those things.

They both just wanted to have fun, To burn off the adrenalin of having _literally_ dodged a bullet.

But that changed by morning.

Because they _clicked_.

Clicked in a way they hadn’t ever before.

And where previously they were gonna go their separate ways to hopefully never see each other ever again to spare themselves the embarrassment, _things had changed_.

Changed in a way they couldn’t comprehend.

But placing a name on a face was a start of a great friendship. And relationship. Because while they didn’t know it yet, the decision they made, one that seemed so insignificant, burned all their bridges, the ones they could have used to get away, down.

But when they spoke simultaneously while staring into each other’s eyes, they didn’t know that. They only cared to know.

“Emmanuel.”

“Neal.”

“Nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you too.”

That was all they could get out before collapsing into hysterical laughter.


End file.
